Couples frequently seek relationship help because of jealousy, on one or both sides, negatively affecting their relationship.
Our couple counseliors understand that jealousy can rear its ugly head in any relationship. It’s a destructive emotion with a poisonous effect on a happy relationship.
The person on the receiving end of a jealous partner is likely to resent having so little trust put in them and may begin to feel suffocated or controlled. This is likely to cause resentment to build up over time. The jealous partner will also suffer. The lack of trust they feel towards their partner is likely to make them feel insecure and isolated.
You might feel rational one minute and then completely irrational the next. You might start to believe your irrational thoughts even though you know deep down they cannot be true. You might feel very insecure and become watchful of your partner’s every move. You might feel you’re unable to trust them and start to feel rejected and unloved. You may question what what they are doing at all times.
Jealousy can cause you to experience a range of feelings, from insecurity and suspicion to rejection, fear, anger or anxiety. If you think jealousy might be an issue in your relationship why not ask yourself the following questions:
Do you question your partner about where they have been and who they have been talking to? Perhaps you feel the need to check their phone, Face Book or e-mail? Maybe you accuse your spouse of flirting?
Jealousy is an unhealthy, miserable, destructive emotion and can often can cause you to say things that you later regret. Jealousy and suspicion robs you of your peace of mind and wreaks havoc in your relationship. It comes through in the way you talk and the way you act, often creating unnecessary worry, fear and confusion.
There are of course times when you might feel you have valid reason to check up on your partner, perhaps they have lied to you in the past? It’s never a good idea to ignore your ‘gut feeling’ or any warning signs that something is wrong. However, it’s always best to try and deal only with ‘factual’ evidence. For many people, jealous impulses are fear-driven and not linked to facts. For more information about jealousy – read our blog Romantic Jealousy
If you have proof that your partner is lying or perhaps disrespecting you in the way they behave, then of course it is best to try and discuss your feelings with them.
However, if you have been unsuccessful, unable or they have been unwilling to talk or listen, then perhaps seeking the help of one of our couple counsellors at Relationship Counselling might be the answer in helping you find the answers you need to help you both move forward. Contact Us Now
We are an experienced team of professional relationship counsellors located throughout Kent. Relationship Counselling Kent will help you gain understanding of your partner’s perspective. This will enable you both to move forward in the direction you choose.
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Jackie Hare My husband and I were both very nervous and unsure of what our session with Jackie would be. We were quickly reassured and had everything explained to us. Jackie is wonderful, she is the perfect mix of funny, reassuring and knowledgeable. My husband and I were in a rut, Jackie helped us to see the importance of us again. We would not hesitate to use Jackie's services again if the need arises, however, using the tools she equipped us with we both believe we won't need to. Jackie helped us talk to each other about things we would never have done so without her help. We are proud of us for going to marriage counselling but we feel very lucky to have met Jackie and used her amazing guidance.
Jackie Hare Dear Jackie, I can't thank you enough for all your help during our sessions. You have given me the tools and skills I need to move forward in a positive way. I particularly liked the way you had saved notes from my first contact for counselling so that at the end we could re-cap and ensure all my issues had been worked through. Having the notes from you has really helped too as I like to be able to read through them so that I don't forget anything important that we talked about. What was really interesting is the way you helped me to work through my problems rather than just suggesting solutions to me. I enjoyed my "eureka" moments where suddenly a penny would drop and I would see something from a completely different perspective. And as far as those eureka moments go, I still have them - do you remember we talked about how unrealistic a lot of those romantic comedies are particularly from the 80s and 90s and I realised recently that a lot of pop songs can be exactly the same if you listen to the lyrics. I listen and watch now with a very different point of view! Not sure if you found it online but the documentary called Romantic Comedy by Elizabeth Sankey is really interesting to watch. Thanking you so much, Best wishes, Neana x
Jackie Hare Jackie helped us at a time when we were approaching rock bottom in our relationship. We both found her to be friendly, very approachable and reassuring. She helped us to communicate at a much deeper level and to understand the other's point of view. We would thoroughly recommend Jackie to any couple going through relationship difficulties.
Kathy Hoggart Kathy Hoggart is amazing! With Kathy’s help my husband and I are back ‘on track’. Kathy reassured us that both of our feelings count and because of this Kathy gained our trust instantly. Kathy quickly helped us to identify what could be causing our issues and how we can use simple techniques and solutions to resolve/manage/accept them. Kathy had a very thoughtful approach throughout our sessions so that they were well planned and logical but also free flowing and flexible and without her being overbearing or dictating the pace. We had quick exercises that we willingly did in between our sessions that also really helped with our conversation during them. The support Kathy gave us to resolve our issues was superb. The tips and encouragement Kathy gave us helped us to work well together during the sessions. We were also able to work independently so that we made good progress from one session to the next. We are still using those tips now and we still remind each other when we need to of the wonderful guidance Kathy gave so that we can continue to benefit from it whenever we need to.
Kaye Barney I have recently been helped by Kaye Barney and through my sessions I can honestly say I have felt improvement. She helped create a open and friendly platform in which we could discuss the relevant topics that helped ease my overall stress and anxiety. I would recommend Kaye very highly and I would not hesitate to book further sessions if I felt the need. I would also recommend the online sessions and found them far less stressful that adding extra travel to my day.