Daniella Smith

Couples Counsellor Aylesford

Hello, my name is Daniella and I am an experienced Couple Counsellor based at Relationship Counselling Kent’s Aylesford practice. I’m fully qualified and hold a level 5 Professional Diploman in ‘Psychotherapeutic Therapy’.  I am also accredited by the NCS (National Counselling Society) therefore bound by their professional and ethical standards.

I have been in private practice for a number of years, providing therapy for both couples and individuals. Alongside working as an NHS Counsellor and Wellbeing Coach.

About relationships

We all need help at certain times in our lives. However, admitting to needing help with our relationships is something people often find difficult and view as a ‘failure’. This is often because they believe that they ‘should’ be able to sort things out for themselves. However, asking for professional relationship help actually shows great strength, not weakness. In my experience, couples always report that they wish they had sought relationship help much sooner.

Human beings are complex and we all have different emotional needs. Having our needs met is important in order for us to feel safe and content within relationships. However, when our relationship runs in to difficulty it can have a great impact on our mental health and wellbeing.

Perhaps your relationship has experienced a shift and things aren’t working as well as they used to be. Or maybe communication between you has diminished or there are changes in your sex life. Sometimes couples are unsure as to when and why the problems in their relationship began but it may have gone on for a number of years.

Life experiences such as bereavement, infidelity, the loss of job or health problems can have a negative impact on our relationships, all of which can leave you feeling lonely, undesirable, insecure and lost. The relationship then can become a battle-ground of stored-up resentment and unkind words.

Maybe you feel your relationship would benefit from you both being able to talk openly, ideally without filtering your feelings about the other person. It can be incredibly empowering to be heard and accepted within our closest relationships.

My approach to couple counselling

I believe we would all benefit from knowing we have a “safe space” to speak to somebody who is unbiased, supportive and understanding. My aim is to ensure that my genuine down-to-earth approach will enable you both to feel comfortable enough to open about what is going on for you in your relationship.

I will not take sides or pass judgement or attribute ‘blame’ in anyway. Instead, I will ask you all the right questions in order to understand what is not working as well as you would like it to, from both your points of view. Whilst helping you both listen to and try and understand each other’s perspectives.

Your reason for seeking relationship counselling might be to “re-boot” your relationship, so you have a happier, more fulfilling future together. I will do everything to ensure you both feel safe and heard. The counselling space is an equal opportunity for you to share how you feel and why and hopefully able to see things from the other person’s perspective.

I will then help you learn new, more effective communication tools and strategies. These will be around increasing kindness and respect for each other by making only relatively small changes.

A positive relationship counselling experience can, amongst other things: –

Increase self-esteem
Improve intimacy between you
Improve your feelings of self-worth in the relationship
Help you both recognise and reduce negative and self-sabotaging behaviour
Leave you feeling more comfortable asking for your needs to be met within the relationship.

Alternatively. perhaps one or both parties feel a separation is inevitable and want help in doing so more amicably. As a neutral person I will support you in doing so whilst maintaining respect and compassion for each other.

As an accredited member of NCS I subscribe to their code of ethics. This includes undertaking continuous professional development and clinical supervision.

If you would like to make an appointment to see Daniella for couples counselling then please contact her via Relationship Counselling Kent today. Request an appointment